• Cari Sans, Coach & Therapist

Rituals: How to create pause, connection & reflection


The holiday season is upon us and you may be feeling a bit overwhelmed or stressed. Maybe you're not and have found a way to relax in the chaos of all the holiday happenings. One of the best things about the holidays are the traditions and rituals that you make take part in. Rituals are a great way to create pause, to connect and to reflect. So, I was thinking that this is the perfect opportunity to insert a new tradition with your family or even yourself.

I know you probably have way too much going on already to have to add something else to your to do list, but rituals can actually help to slow you down and create that pause that is needed in the day to release the daily pressures. Rituals can offer a sense of peace and comfort. They create a space for you to pause and reflect. A ritual provides that certainty we need to be more in a loving and connecting state. And even more importantly, rituals bring people together.

What rituals do you practice now for yourself or with your family?

One of my favorite rituals with my kids is reading before they go off to bed. Every night we read two stories together. I love studying their faces as they listen and the deep feeling of gratitude I have for them and that moment together. I then tuck them in to bed, kiss them and share sweet words. Every evening, I also take out my workout clothes and place them on my dresser to be easily put on in the early morning hours. This ritual is so important to my workouts, that I do not believe I would have committed as long as I have if this step were missing.

One of the ways my extended family and I have helped to reduce the pressures of getting out and buying gifts for a continuously growing family, is to do a Secret Santa. All the adults purchase a gift for a set dollar amount and then we play a fun game during the gift grab. It is so much fun! We laugh, we joke and we all feel connected during this time as we play together.

This year can be an opportunity for you to embrace rituals. Recognize the ones that exist. Build in something new.

What rituals would you like to incorporate into your life and relationships? Is it something to help you get your day started? A way to create a pause in the day? A time for family to connect? A time for reflection?

Consider how adding a new ritual into your life and relationships can help you to further reach that which you desire. Remember the change process…

Firs imagine your life or relationships engaging in this ritual. Build hope for what this ritual will mean for your life and helping you to create what you desire. Then make it happen.

You may need the help from others (like your family), to make it happen so enlist their help. When you have participated in this new ritual, celebrate in any big or small way. If your family is involved, celebrate with them, too. Always go back and review how this is working and adjust as needed. Repeat this cycle often.

The holiday time is filled with many rituals and the perfect opportunity to create a new ritual with yourself or with those you care about. May your ritual give you purpose, connection and an opportunity to reflect.

Happy Holidays!


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