Do you should yourself often? Do you say, “I should do this or I should have done that?” You might tell yourself that you desire something in your life, yet nothing or not enough changes. But you should do it, right? You tell yourself you should.
The problem….is motivation.
This type of language is lacking any kind of motivation behind it. If you want something to change, there must be a must in there. “I must get that project done this week.” “I must lose the weight now.” “I must get a handle on dealing with the kid’s behavior today.” Try saying both ways and change out the words must and should. Do you hear the difference? Do you feel the difference?
There is more power, energy and clarity behind the must. It is not wishy-washy words.
Now, think of an outcome you desire. How would you typically talk to yourself about getting this? Say it to yourself. Next, say it with a must. You should feel a difference just by changing the language and by doing so you change what you put your attention on as well as your bodies physiology. Feel the energy. Feel the urgency.
By creating a sense of urgency around what it is you desire, you are creating a situation to which you will take action. Action of course is what is needed to make the change happen. Without that motivation behind it, you may continue to say you will do something but yet never feel the urgency to get it and therefore let another day pass by.
Here are four steps to help you to get motivated:
Step 1- Decide today what it is that you desire and get clarity. Get specific about something you have been wanting but yet have not accomplished. The more specific the easier it will be to measure whether or not you get there. Ask yourself how will you know if you have this? What would be different? Who will notice? Who else is involved and how will they be different? Clarify the details of what it is you want.
Step 2-Determine if this is something that you can accomplish and what resources you need. Do you have the means to reach this outcome? If you believe that you do not, is there something you can do to help with this? Is there something you need, a resource, or maybe further education/support? Do you need someone’s help?
Step 3-Decide if you are willing to create this change. Are you willing to let go of something to gain what it is you desire? What will you have to prioritize? Are you willing to put the work into it?
Step 4-Set an action date. If you notice in the must examples provided earlier, there is an action at the end of the statements. “I must do this today.” “I must do this within 90 days.” Decide when you will make this change and commit to working on it daily.
Sometimes we need support and encouragement along our journey, so seek out whatever resources that will help provide this for you. Decide today, take action and don’t let another day slip away.