Becoming a Mom has changed me in so many ways and has helped me to mature. First, my children's behaviors push me like no other, well maybe close to my father when I was a strong-willed teen--lol. Seriously, it is like they know every button to push me. I pray to God sometimes, saying I know there is a lesson in all this. Please give me the strength. Parenting is no joke. But, I believe we all have people in our lives that know how to hit that reactive button in you, and off you go. I also think that we can grow so much as a person within these relationships.
Maybe you have developed excellent coping skills for these triggers, or perhaps you still struggle with keeping yourself together in those moments. Wherever you fall on that scale, it helps to have tools. Tools give you options for how to handle situations where you feel like your life is out of control.
No longer do I fall into the trap of thinking that these things are happening to me. I have shifted my mindset around this negative thinking and now see it as an opportunity to grow. This shift is not always easy to do, sometimes I have to vent out the feelings and frustrations, which I have an adult support system to help me to do this with, and sometimes I am just so unconsciously competent in it because I have been working this muscle for so long. Please don't mistake this for perfection. I at times will react to my children or others. I am human. However, I have a toolbox full to keep myself above water.
Tools give us the means to work on the stuff in our lives that need fixing. As a coach & therapist, I make sure that I set my clients toolbox up well so that they have options especially when the first thing is not working right, they can try something else. What happens if you don't have anything but one tool or way of dealing with things and that is not working? Think about what it would feel like to have options?
Want to hear more about what I am talking about and learn tools to help you feel more in control of your own life? Watch my interview with my coach friend, Jen McKay, where I share tips on how to gain control in your life and empower yourself.
Let us know your thoughts in the comments over at the Perspectives channel (you can subscribe here for more FREE videos from other coaches) or in the comments below. If you would like to learn more about how to effectively apply these tools and more into your life & relationships, I invite you to book a call with me by visiting my calendar here.